Post by Yuk YuK on Feb 7, 2006 3:22:30 GMT -5
This was written by a black guy in Texas and is so funny. What a great sense of humor and creativity!!!
When I born, I black,
when I grow up, I black,
when I go in sun, I black,
when I cold, I black,
when I scared, I black,
when I sick, I black,
and when I die, I still black.
You white folks....
when you born, you pink,
when you grow up, you white,
when you go in sun, you red,
when you cold, you blue,
when you scared, you yellow,
when you sick, you green,
when you bruised, you purple,
and when you die, you gray.
So who you callin' colored folk's
Life's lesson No. 1
There once was a bunch of tiny frogs,...... who arranged a running competition.
The goal was to reach the top of a very high tower.
A big crowd had gathered around the tower to see the race and cheer on the contestants...
The race began...
Honestly:
No one in crowd really believed that the tiny frogs would reach the top of the tower.
You heard statements such as:
"Oh, WAY too difficult!!"
"They will NEVER make it to the top."
or:
"Not a chance that they will succeed. The tower is too high!"
The tiny frogs began collapsing. One by one...
... Except for those who in a fresh tempo were climbing higher and higher...
The crowd continued to yell
"It is too difficult!!! No one will make it!"
More tiny frogs got tired and gave up...
...But ONE continued higher and higher and higher...
This one wouldn't give up!
At the end everyone else had given up climbing the tower. Except for the one tiny frog who after a big effort was the only one who reached the top!
THEN all of the other tiny frogs naturally wanted to know how this one frog managed to do it?
A contestant asked the tiny frog how the one who succeeded had found the strength to reach the goal?
It turned out...
That the winner was DEAF!!!!
The wisdom of this story is:
Never listen to other people's tendencies to be
negative or pessimistic...
...cause they take your most wonderful dreams and wishes away from you. The ones you have in your heart!
Always think of the power words have.
Because everything you hear and read will affect your actions!
Therefore:
ALWAYS be...
POSITIVE!
and above all:
Be DEAF when people tell YOU that YOU can not fulfil YOUR dreams!
Always think:
I can do this!
Give them some motivation!!!
Dear Faculty and Staff:
>
> It has been brought to the administration's attention that
> some individuals throughout the system have been
> using foul language during the course of normal
> conversation with their coworkers.
>
> Due to complaints received from some employees who may
> be easily offended, this type of language will be no
> longer been tolerated. We do however, realize the
> critical importance of being able to accurately
> express your feelings when communicating with
> coworkers.
>
> Therefore, a list of "TRY SAYING" new phrases has been
> provided so that proper exchange of ideas and
> information can continue in an effective manner
> without risk of offending our more sensitive
> staff.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> Perhaps I can work late.
> INSTEAD OF:
> And when the f**k do you expect me to do this?
>
> TRY SAYING:
> I'm certain that isn't feasible.
> INSTEAD OF:
> No f**king way.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> Really?
> INSTEAD OF:
> You've got to be pooping me!
>
> TRY SAYING:
> Perhaps you should check with...
> INSTEAD OF:
> Tell someone who gives a poop.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> I wasn't involved in the project.
> INSTEAD OF:
> It's not my f**king problem.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> That's interesting.
> INSTEAD OF:
> What the f**k?
>
> TRY SAYING:
> I'm not sure this can be implemented.
> INSTEAD OF:
> This poop won't work.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> I'll try to schedule that.
> INSTEAD OF:
> Why the hell didn't you tell me sooner?
>
> TRY SAYING:
> He's not familiar with the issues.
> INSTEAD OF:
> He's got his head up his ass.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> Excuse me, sir?
> INSTEAD OF:
> Eat poop and die.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> So you weren't happy with it?
> INSTEAD OF:
> I disagree.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> I'm a bit overloaded at the moment.
> INSTEAD OF:
> f**k it, I'm on salary.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> I don't think you understand.
> INSTEAD OF:
> Shove it up your ass.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> I love a challenge.
> INSTEAD OF:
> This job sucks.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> You want me to take care of that?
> INSTEAD OF:
> Who the hell died and made you boss?
>
> TRY SAYING:
> I see.
> INSTEAD OF:
> Blow me.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> I think you could use more training.
> INSTEAD OF:
> You don't know what the f**k you're doing.
>
> Thank You,
> Personnel
When I born, I black,
when I grow up, I black,
when I go in sun, I black,
when I cold, I black,
when I scared, I black,
when I sick, I black,
and when I die, I still black.
You white folks....
when you born, you pink,
when you grow up, you white,
when you go in sun, you red,
when you cold, you blue,
when you scared, you yellow,
when you sick, you green,
when you bruised, you purple,
and when you die, you gray.
So who you callin' colored folk's
Life's lesson No. 1
There once was a bunch of tiny frogs,...... who arranged a running competition.
The goal was to reach the top of a very high tower.
A big crowd had gathered around the tower to see the race and cheer on the contestants...
The race began...
Honestly:
No one in crowd really believed that the tiny frogs would reach the top of the tower.
You heard statements such as:
"Oh, WAY too difficult!!"
"They will NEVER make it to the top."
or:
"Not a chance that they will succeed. The tower is too high!"
The tiny frogs began collapsing. One by one...
... Except for those who in a fresh tempo were climbing higher and higher...
The crowd continued to yell
"It is too difficult!!! No one will make it!"
More tiny frogs got tired and gave up...
...But ONE continued higher and higher and higher...
This one wouldn't give up!
At the end everyone else had given up climbing the tower. Except for the one tiny frog who after a big effort was the only one who reached the top!
THEN all of the other tiny frogs naturally wanted to know how this one frog managed to do it?
A contestant asked the tiny frog how the one who succeeded had found the strength to reach the goal?
It turned out...
That the winner was DEAF!!!!
The wisdom of this story is:
Never listen to other people's tendencies to be
negative or pessimistic...
...cause they take your most wonderful dreams and wishes away from you. The ones you have in your heart!
Always think of the power words have.
Because everything you hear and read will affect your actions!
Therefore:
ALWAYS be...
POSITIVE!
and above all:
Be DEAF when people tell YOU that YOU can not fulfil YOUR dreams!
Always think:
I can do this!
Give them some motivation!!!
Dear Faculty and Staff:
>
> It has been brought to the administration's attention that
> some individuals throughout the system have been
> using foul language during the course of normal
> conversation with their coworkers.
>
> Due to complaints received from some employees who may
> be easily offended, this type of language will be no
> longer been tolerated. We do however, realize the
> critical importance of being able to accurately
> express your feelings when communicating with
> coworkers.
>
> Therefore, a list of "TRY SAYING" new phrases has been
> provided so that proper exchange of ideas and
> information can continue in an effective manner
> without risk of offending our more sensitive
> staff.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> Perhaps I can work late.
> INSTEAD OF:
> And when the f**k do you expect me to do this?
>
> TRY SAYING:
> I'm certain that isn't feasible.
> INSTEAD OF:
> No f**king way.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> Really?
> INSTEAD OF:
> You've got to be pooping me!
>
> TRY SAYING:
> Perhaps you should check with...
> INSTEAD OF:
> Tell someone who gives a poop.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> I wasn't involved in the project.
> INSTEAD OF:
> It's not my f**king problem.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> That's interesting.
> INSTEAD OF:
> What the f**k?
>
> TRY SAYING:
> I'm not sure this can be implemented.
> INSTEAD OF:
> This poop won't work.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> I'll try to schedule that.
> INSTEAD OF:
> Why the hell didn't you tell me sooner?
>
> TRY SAYING:
> He's not familiar with the issues.
> INSTEAD OF:
> He's got his head up his ass.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> Excuse me, sir?
> INSTEAD OF:
> Eat poop and die.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> So you weren't happy with it?
> INSTEAD OF:
> I disagree.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> I'm a bit overloaded at the moment.
> INSTEAD OF:
> f**k it, I'm on salary.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> I don't think you understand.
> INSTEAD OF:
> Shove it up your ass.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> I love a challenge.
> INSTEAD OF:
> This job sucks.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> You want me to take care of that?
> INSTEAD OF:
> Who the hell died and made you boss?
>
> TRY SAYING:
> I see.
> INSTEAD OF:
> Blow me.
>
> TRY SAYING:
> I think you could use more training.
> INSTEAD OF:
> You don't know what the f**k you're doing.
>
> Thank You,
> Personnel