CHRISTMAS GIFTS and Humor

[[EoM]Pr0c3550r[Q2C]]

Gay Humor.....ewwwwww

lol

[[EoM]Console]

From: www.somethingawful.com/d/cliff-yablonski/
CLIFF YABLONSKI HATES YOU



THE OFFICIAL CLIFF YABLONSKI CHRISTMAS STORY

by Cliff Yablonski
Dictated by Lowtax

CLIFF:"It was two days before Christmas, what, maybe ten years ago or some shit like that. All I remembers was that it was ungodly hot. Really steaming up the place, making you sweat and piss like nobody's business. I was chugging down beers like two, three at a time. Sweating like a fucking hog too.

So anyways, there I am on my porch, sitting on my lawnchair. I'm just minding my own damn business, waiting for the broad across the street to come out and do some gardening so I can stare at that candy-apple ass she's got. Her husband's some kind of prick though, he's like a lawyer or some shit like that. The little dickhead comes by the gas station one time and paid for 10 bucks of gas with a freaking 100 dollar bill. Like he's all important or something. I hate pricks like him. Back during the Korean War, when I was platooned at the 43rd Naval Fueling Station, I would've shoved my combat boot so far up the jerk's ass he would be tasting the dog shit I stepped on for weeks.

Where was I? Oh yeah, it was real fucking hot. So there I am, just sitting around and BAM, some Ford comes crashing into my mailbox. I'm like "What the FUCK?" and I get up and grab my bat to cave in the punk's face. But the door opens, and it's the hot broad from across the street! I reached over to 'help' her out of the car (and maybe grab a piece of ass) and she gives me this look like "Cliff, you fucking stud, I want to jump your 74-year old bones right here, right now" so I unzip my fly and let my shrived penis jump out. Next thing I know, she's screaming and her weasly little lawyer husband is running out of the house. He comes at me, I kinda step out of the way, and he trips over his own clumsy ass feet and falls on his face! I start laughing so hard I shit myself, the broad runs off into her house, and the Chinaman down the street calls the cops on me. Funniest fucking thing ever."

LOWTAX:"What does this have to do with Christmas, Cliff?"

CLIFF:"Shut the fuck up."

THE END, MERRY CHRISTMAS!

[[EoM]Shogun]

merry christmas everyone, im drunk so what haha
I love those nude pictures gimme more so i dont have to go to porn sites please. haha im drunk and loving it. Live your life yeah yeah yeah. IM a paper chaser. haha

[[EoM]Shogun]

lol that one with the carrot and vibrator is fucking hilarious.

[[EoM]Pr0c3550r[Q2C]]